In your life’s defining moments there are
two choices – you either step forward in faith and power or you step backward
into fear.
~James Arthur Ray.
If you had asked
me a year ago I’d have said “Never. Another cat with our Miss? Never!” Our
current feline companion, Miss, was VERY territorial and quite the scrappy
little street fighter when it came to furry neighborhood relationships. She’s
been known to jump on a dog’s head that had the temerity to get too close! Visits to the emergency vet clinics, stitches, staples, oozing abscesses...oh yea, we've had them all with her.
She’s adorable
and quite loveable when it suits her. A most welcome addition to our family but
she didn’t come without some emotional baggage of her own. She desperately
needs love (who doesn’t) but prefers to be aloof and often pretends she’s
uninterested in getting it. And she’s definitely best suited to a one cat
family.
Miss came to us
from neighboring friends 6 years ago. Simply unwilling to live there she would
come to our garden daily to see what we were doing or just to lounge quietly in
the sun. We did what we could to help our friends with her attitude about their
lodgings but to no avail. When awakened at 2 am as she stood outside our
opened, upstairs bedroom window meowing, we knew then we were in trouble. She
had made her choice…she’d live with us someday. It seems we attract strays
somehow. And that’s not a bad thing in my opinion. I think I’ve always been in
favor of the underdog, er…undercat as the case may be. Most of our four legged
companions have come via their own wanderings.
Zeke is our
latest addition but he didn’t come to us. We went to him. He lived across the
street for several years. We knew him by sight but not whether he was a he or a
she. As a matter of fact, I can remember chasing out of our garden on a few
occasions. With Miss’ preference for a super-sized bubble of personal space and
willing to fight for it, we didn’t need another nemesis coming around. Sadly,
his people died last year and family members left him to fend for himself. He
just stayed there on the porch. Waiting. Quite alone. A few of us in the
surrounding houses started feeding him and gave him fresh water daily. No one
knew if he had a name. I called him Zoe, not knowing he wasn’t a she at the
time. I hadn’t been able to get close enough to him to see if he was a Zoe or
not. He was mistrustful of anyone and was quick to run as I approached. Finally
I saw he was not a Zoe. What should we call him? Hubby suggested Zeke. Zeke it
is. Zeke has issues. Don’t we all? By his reactions, sadly I suspect abuse in
his early life. Oh, but he’s a charmer, a sweet lovable guy very much in need
of human companionship. Charismatic if you will, the way he tilts his head when
he looks at you or the way the white patch on his chest waddles as he runs to
us or the way his lip get hooked up over his tooth and he just stares at you as
if to say “what are you laughing at?”. He’s welcome and most definitely wanted
by the humans in our family.
But integrating
him into the family won’t be without complications. Not only getting past his
deep fears but also one by the name of Miss.
As mentioned she had issues too. I wonder if she can put aside her jealousy and
see that Zeke is in need of a safe place just like she was all those years
ago. While she’s been reluctant, oddly I
think she does understand. She mellows when we have those chats.
On the other hand
Zeke needs to accept her too. She was here first and we want to maintain her
standing as Alpha cat. But he’s a scrapper also. Over the months it has not gone
as we would have liked. At first he was all meek and mild, then as he got more
comfortable he got aggressive. For every step forward toward progress with
these two, we have had 3 steps back to the beginning. There have been fights, tumbles, hissing and
vying for territory within the house and garden. There have been hurt feline
feelings and aggressive brawls. It has taken time, too much time for my liking.
Nor has progress been made toward two cats living in the same house. We don’t
prefer leaving the cats out as cars, dogs, and wildlife are just too dangerous
for that. We much prefer to keep them indoors but when you adopt you have to
work with what you get. It took several years for Miss to be happy with more
time spent inside than out. Zeke is more of a challenge, I doubt he was ever allowed
indoors so it’s is frightening to him. Winter was coming and he wasn’t bout to
be come comfortable indoors enough to sleep nights inside nor days when we are
at work. Once inside you can just see his anxiety level rise. Once let out
again, he calms considerably. If our cats could have their druthers the back
door to the garden would always be left open.
Open doors are
great for warm summers but its winter now. No can do, so I bought a heated
outdoor pad made specifically for animals and made him a nice shelter, much
like a dog house. I used some unused beehive equipment and put it under the
potting bench somewhat protected from the wind and rain. It took several design
revisions before I got the right combination of bee boxes and location that
suited his fearful nature. With all earlier attempts he would only stay in it
for a little while and not at night. Seems he preferred his under bushes or
some other burrow for his bed where he had a good view of his surroundings and
a quick escape plan. At first I made the box with only one door, which turned
out to be the problem. His fear of being enclosed made it too frightening. So I
cut another opening on the side for escape and more visibility. He needs to be
able to see what’s going on from several angles and have more than one way of
escape, depending on from where the danger is approaching. Such fear. Its so sad.
Things turned
around nicely after I cut the second opening. He started really using the ‘spa’
as we call it now, since it’s heated and padded with fleecy material. Now he’s
in it most of the day every day and nearly every night. It’s a rare night that
he stays somewhere else, and we still don’t know where. Now that I’ve hit on a
design that he can be comfortable with I will be painting it all the same
color. He has also learned our schedules. He’s always at our backdoor for
breakfast and dinner. This is all real progress and its been just short of a
year.
And this is how
it is today with the two of them. Wary tolerance from a distance. Oh well, all in
all not too bad considering.
In Bloom In My Garden Today: Crocus, Cyclamen coum, Galanthus elwesii (snowdrops), Heath (Erica carnea 'springwood white'), Hellebore, Sarcococca confusa
Author’s photos
2 comments:
I LOVE THIS JOAN!
what a heart you have for these two!
in time...we all adapt and grow. even our fur friends, no?
my pup...EATS everything. silly girl.
sigh.
xo
Hi Annie!
Thanks for your encouragement and you are right. Flexibility is key in life.
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